CWTCH V1 & V2

It's almost a year since I released my debut tracks 'JL833191A' and 'Quantifiers'. I'm really pleased to be able to share something new, even if it has been close to ten months in the making, so thanks for coming to read this. Whether I know you or not at all, I really appreciate it...

This track has been knocking around for a little while and I think it just needed a context in which to fit it in to. I moved back to Kent in July 2016 after moving out of London and exiting a long term relationship. To say the least I wasn't in the best state of mental health at the time, I think it was probably the lowest i've ever felt in my life, it was quite dark and now looking back in hindsight, was almost unbelievable. However, I had some counselling and started teaching music in August, this allowed me to slowly build myself back up over the following months. I loved that I was contributing towards peoples education and the daily offering of knowledge really helped me feel good about myself again.

At the end of November, I thought i'd take a look into Tinder...it's not something i'd ever used and I almost felt silly even being on it. I'd never been in the headspace of wanting to date. I think really I was just intrigued as I wanted to meet new people and being outside of a city, that can be difficult, especially in a small commuter town on the outskirts of London. So on my way home from work one evening I got a "match" and started chatting away. I then got an invite to go over to this person's house after twenty minutes.  I thought it was strange to be given this sort of invite as a first date, firstly as she has no idea who I am coming into her home and I don't know what i'll be going in to. Surprising myself, I went to meet this person. Within the first ten minutes, she told me that she had been signed off work with anxiety and was currently really struggling, it looked like she hadn't slept for days. I remember being really taken a back with how upfront she was about this. I thought this was quite courageous. We chatted for a while, talking about music, work, friends etc. I realised that she was just lonely and needed someone to talk to who was completely outside of her friendship circles, pretty much like myself at the time. She was experiencing some prejudices at work, she was far away from her family on the other side of the country and suffering from mental health issues. I slept over next to her that night without anything physical happening, she actually broke down into tears a couple of times which was quite awkward and upsetting, but I did what I could to comfort her. I remember looking at four carved wooden letters on the mantel piece which spelt 'CWTCH', which is the welsh word for hug or embrace. I thought it would be appropriate to use this as the title for this song, from which I started to write the lyrics, themed around this experience.

I said goodbye the next morning and haven't seen this person again. I wasn't in the best frame of mind myself for anything to develop and some things are best left.

I have also released a V2 of the song, which doesn't feature any vocals, other than a speech by David Foster Wallace. I listened to this speech not long after that night and I felt that it summed up how I felt about the experience. These compositions are a reflection and interpretation of something i've experienced, I hope they do something for you.

This track wouldn't of sounded or appeared as it does without the input of some good friends. Thanks to Fiona McAuley for playing the violin, her input really brought the track to life. David Trevillion whose first band I grew up listening to, for recording the drum parts, a real pleasure to work with. Check his other work here. Finally to Ed Bidgood for the incredible artwork, go and check out his design work and music here.

Thanks for reading and if you would like to own a copy of the song, please head to my BandCamp where the song can be downloaded for £1. The money will be donated to the charity CRISIS who are working to end homelessness. Alternatively you can stream them on Soundcloud or YouTube

Duncan.